Unsomnambulist
Staff member
Random TV Thoughts
- Thread starter Zeeba Neighba
- Start date
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On this date, September 4, in 1962, the “Dick Van Dyke Show” filmed its 35th episode, “Hustling the Hustler.” Directed by John Rich and written by Carl Reiner, the episode features a memorable tag scene in which Laura executes a tricky pool shot when she manages to sink three balls into three separate pockets with a single stroke of the cue--a difficult play that was, incredibly, captured in a single shot with no stunt double or trick photography.
As "Dick Van Dyke Show" editor Bud Molin recalled in the pages of “The Official Dick Van Dyke Show Book,” the pool balls were preset in such a way that a professional pool player would be able to tap them into place--and the intention was to have Mary Tyler Moore shoot a master shot where she would hit the preset pool balls as best she could, with no expectation that she'd actually successfully drop the three balls in their respective pockets. Then, the plan was to have director John Rich shoot a second take of the pool shot executed by a professional pool player they had standing by, who would actually complete the pool shot in a close-up insert that would be edited in later.
But, to the astonishment of all present, Mary managed to sink the shot perfectly on the very first try in the master take--which, if you watch her reaction as all three balls sail into their appointed pockets, seemed as big a surprise to her as anyone else in the studio that night. "It was just luck," recalled Bud Molin. "She hit it, and she dropped every ball!”—Vince Waldron
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George Burns : "Jack played a lot of golf, but he wasn't much of a golfer. Actually, Jack wasn't much of an athlete of any kind. Let me put it this way—he was uncoordinated at cards. On a golf course, Jack had the hands of a violinist. That was fair, because as a violinist, Jack had the hands of a golfer. Actually, I think he probably could have hit a golf ball just as far with a violin as he did with a golf club. I'll tell you how bad a golfer Jack was. Here's the sound of Jack hitting a golf ball: "Go ahead, Jack, take another swing."
One day as we walked along the fairway, he started shaking his head in frustration. "I keep thinking that this is going to be the day I break par," he said, "but I never do, never. Why did God make me such a lousy golfer?"
"Oh, stop complaining," I said, "you're a rich guy, Jack. You've got one of the most popular shows on television, you're famous all over the world. Golf is the only thing you do lousy, so be a little grateful."
"Oh, I wouldn't care about any of that," Jack said, "if I could just be a great golfer."
I stopped. "Wait a second, Jack. You're trying to tell me that if God came to you right now and said, 'Okay, Jackson, you can have your choice, you can have a lousy television show and a great golf game, or a great television show and a lousy golf game, you'd take the lousy show and the great golf game?"
"That's right," he insisted.
"All right then," I said, "how great a golfer would you want to be?"
Jack thought about that. "I guess that depends," he admitted, "how lousy would God want my TV show to be?"
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It's 1977, I'm 9 years old. My mom and dad are roaring with laughter and I don't understand what's so funny.
Q . Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?
A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness! (The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn’t neglected.
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years?
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A.. Rose Marie: No, wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?
A.George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
From: We Pretend It's Still the 70's
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Andy Taylor: Well, as Mark Twain said, everybody complains about the weather but nobody does anything about it.
Floyd Lawson: Did he say that?
Andy Taylor: Mm-hmm.
Floyd Lawson: I thought Calvin Coolidge said that.
Andy Taylor: No, no Floyd, Calvin Coolidge didn't say that.
Floyd Lawson: What'd Calvin Coolidge say?
Ojai Sam
Staff member
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"
From Wikipedia:
Silent Cal"
President Harding and Vice President Coolidge with their wives
The U.S. vice-presidency did not carry many official duties, but Coolidge was invited by President Harding to attend cabinet meetings, making him the first vice president to do so.[84] He gave a number of unremarkable speeches around the country.[85]
As vice president, Coolidge and his vivacious wife Grace were invited to quite a few parties, where the legend of "Silent Cal" was born. It is from this time that most of the jokes and anecdotes involving Coolidge originate, such as Coolidge being "silent in five languages".[86] Although Coolidge was known to be a skilled and effective public speaker, in private he was a man of few words and was commonly referred to as "Silent Cal". An apocryphal story has it that a person seated next to him at a dinner said to him, "I made a bet today that I could get more than two words out of you." He replied, "You lose."[87] However, on April 22, 1924, Coolidge himself said that the "You lose" quotation never occurred. The story about it was related by Frank B. Noyes, President of the Associated Press, to their membership at their annual luncheon at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel, when toasting and introducing Coolidge, who was the invited speaker. After the introduction and before his prepared remarks, Coolidge said to the membership, "Your President [referring to Noyes] has given you a perfect example of one of those rumors now current in Washington which is without any foundation."[88]
Coolidge often seemed uncomfortable among fashionable Washington society; when asked why he continued to attend so many of their dinner parties, he replied, "Got to eat somewhere."[89] Alice Roosevelt Longworth, a leading Republican wit, underscored Coolidge's silence and his dour personality: "When he wished he were elsewhere, he pursed his lips, folded his arms, and said nothing. He looked then precisely as though he had been weaned on a pickle."[90] Coolidge and his wife, Grace, who was a great baseball fan, once attended a Washington Senators game and sat through all nine innings without saying a word, except once when he asked her the time.[91]
As president, Coolidge's reputation as a quiet man continued. "The words of a President have an enormous weight," he would later write, "and ought not to be used indiscriminately."[92] Coolidge was aware of his stiff reputation; indeed, he cultivated it. "I think the American people want a solemn ass as a President," he once told Ethel Barrymore, "and I think I will go along with them."[93] Some historians suggest that Coolidge's image was created deliberately as a campaign tactic,[94] while others believe his withdrawn and quiet behavior to be natural, deepening after the death of his son in 1924.[95] Dorothy Parker, upon learning that Coolidge had died, reportedly remarked, "How can they tell?"[96]
Ojai Sam
Staff member
True story:
When I was in high school, my AP US History class required a term paper about a president of our choice. I was out sick the day we made our selections and was left with Coolidge. He turned out to be a very interesting subject and I wound up with an A.
Oh, yeah. I did have another choice:
When I was in high school, my AP US History class required a term paper about a president of our choice. I was out sick the day we made our selections and was left with Coolidge. He turned out to be a very interesting subject and I wound up with an A.
Oh, yeah. I did have another choice:
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Mariska Hargitay Helps Lost Child Who Mistook Her For Real Cop On 'SVU' Set
The matter reportedly stopped production on the "Law & Order" spinoff for 20 minutes.